This was hard. REALLY hard. I felt a whole spectrum of emotions on this one. With the Konmari method, you are supposed to hold each item in your hand and keep only the ones that “spark joy”. With music, I was troubled. Sometimes music makes you feel something other than joy. But it’s not a bad thing. Music is meant to match a mood. At least that’s what I think. So it was hard to do this, because music is something that you feel, yes, but not feel when you are holding a cd in your hands. Without listening to music, it’s tricky to make a decision.
I found a lot of my music collection had quite sad memories for me. I did a lot of crying. F kept asking me if I was ok. I realised that apart from my earlier music that was all on vinyl and cassette tapes, I had never thrown away any of it. This was the first part of facing my past through this process and I did not like it one little bit.
I remember reading somewhere that smells evoked memories much more than photos. I wonder what that person would say about music. But I had way more music than I could flick through. I came across bands that I had long forgotten existed. An extremely eclectic collection that was really a library for all moods. Except the reason that it was so hard to feel by touching the CDs was because I hadn’t listened to the music for so long that I had forgotten even what it was. In some cases, I didn’t hesitate when deciding whether to keep one or not. In other cases, it took longer. For the most part, these were the ones that I decided to let go. I didn’t count how many I had, my folder holds about 96, I think. Some were in cases, others just with the sleeves as I had kept them in the CD folder. I threw out all of the burned copies, boxed up the rest and offered them to my friends. A lady I know took them all for her teenage daughter who loves music of all kinds. That was really great, because I was happy knowing they could bring someone else joy (or misery, sadness, elation, whatever they are looking for!).
The DVDs were much easier. We have Netflix anyway, and there is so much online that there’s really not much need for DVDs for watching at home. Most of our DVDs are children’s ones, which I didn’t touch, of course. I had to check with Y that he was ok with me letting these go, since technically they are ours, but fortunately he was fine. He’s not sentimental with stuff like this.
This day also saw me sitting on the toilet for a lot of it..tmi, I know, but letting go of stuff/memories/the past comes through in bodily functions too..so weird…and a bit creepy, but all good.
And these were the ones I decided to keep, the CDs fitting nicely into a clear plastic carry box that I had left over from my documents:
This was pretty dramatic for me. I felt so very much lighter and had loads of energy. I took it out on the gym later.