Peace and Quiet

 

Ok, so it’s been about a month since I started weaning Luka.  I still want to give him a bedtime feed for as long as we both want to, but am really ready to cut out the daytime feeding.  It’s so tiring, apart from anything else.  So we are down to one in the morning, I use that term loosely because everyone I know would classify 5:30a.m. as anything but, one at bedtime and a “dream feed” at around 11:30p.m.  However, arghhhhh, today and I think it was a few days ago, I fed him mid-morning.  Just to get him to go to sleep.  I really did try today.  He was like the living dead. 

We went to take Hannah to nursery, then when I got him out of the car back home he looked as if he could drop off at any minute.  Then he came with me to play upstairs while I hung out the laundry, which I ended up doing while holding him..tricky.  Then downstairs I opened up the little sofa bed for him to lie on and rubbed his head..no go..screaming and yanking at mouth.  Paracetamol and bonjela later, still no go.  Put Baby T.V. on, but very lively for naptime..hmm, maybe I should record some of the relaxing whirly stuff they show on there at night, so tried The Very Hungry Caterpillar.  He wasn’t happy lying on his own, so he climbed on me.  Very calm, watched his eyelids getting ready to close, and then round God knows what, 3, 4?  He sat up and grizzled some more.  Tried knocking his head against the cabinet door, waggling his arms in protest, grizzle grizzle grizzle.  Carried him around and bounced him a bit, then just gave up and let him feed :((  Felt INSTANTLY exhausted, and am now drinking coffee to wake up so that I can do the cleaning.  Not sure that I can keep it up.  I had no idea the breastfeeding was so tiring until I stopped.  No wonder, I felt pretty much the same, tiredwise, as I had when I was pregnant.  No wonder I can never get enough sleep!  I justified today by telling myself that the only person to lose out by giving in, is me.

Well, I suppose it means that when I finally CAN get down to just one bedtime feed, I have all this energy to look forward to!  Yay! 

Am on Day 700 of de-cluttering.  Who knew you could accumulate so much stuff that you really don’t even need?!?  I thought I would feel sad to let things go, but once they are gone, I don’t miss them even a little bit.  Wonder if that will come later…I am not from the wartime generation, of course, but think it has been drilled into me from my parents, hee hee!  Such a waste to throw “useful” items away.

Didn’t know what to do with the DVDs I didn’t want anymore, but yay, Sophie will take them.  Glad I could donate them, and even better to someone I know who can get use out of them without some corporate fat cat making a profit 🙂

Today I am attacking the bathroom cabinets.  This one could be hard.  I loved long baths and pampering, but I haven’t had time for the past three and a half years.  I’m sure a lot of the products are well past their best.  Deep breath, here I go…

September 8th 053

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2 thoughts on “Peace and Quiet

  1. Hi!
    I found your blog a while back and was interested to read about your life..my life is kind of the opposite to yours..married to a Japanese guy but we live in the UK (we’ve been here 16 mths now) and we have only one child- an almost 3 yr old (how did she get big so quickly?!) girl..your breastfeeding related blog really resonated with me (hence me leaving a comment, sorry for lurking!)..Kai-chan still breastfeeds..and although i do sometimes feel tired (especially at a certain time of the month) it is such a wonderful thing-for you and your son..don’t stop too hastily! breastfeeding through toodlerhood has helped her in so many ways..though maybe you know this from your daughter? kai used to nap if i carried her-onbu or front style-would that work for you? tiredness sucks doesn’t it..could you have a quick nap with him? maybe he’ll soon grow out of the need to breastfeed during the day? oh…i hope you feel less tired soon!

  2. sorry to hear abut your struggles with luka… having met him im guessing hes quiet strong willed so i can tell its probably not the easiest thing to take away his night boobies

    its only been 6 weeks here and sometimes i am just so tired of the bf-ing thing esp. at night when im exhausted and ryohei hands me the baby and i cant hand her back and see put her on your own bloody boobies lol

    glad to hear hannah is a bit better

    hope we can see you guys soon
    xx

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